What is Your Reproductive Story?

You may be asking yourself: my reproductive…what? The concept of a reproductive story is not super common to hear about; I actually never heard of the term until I was completing training to get certified in perinatal mental health. Yet our reproductive story is important to consider, and deserves more attention than it gets.

So, what is a reproductive story?

Your reproductive story is a culmination of your expectations and experiences with pregnancy, birth, loss, and family. It begins as early as it can, with what your feelings were toward a family as you were growing up. For some, there has been a lifelong dream of becoming a parent, and for others there hasn’t.

Ask yourself: what were my expectations for a family as I was younger?

Continue reflecting on how this dream may have changed over time. Maybe you grew stronger in conviction of having a family (or not), met a partner with different expectations, or witnessed experiences around you that shifted your perspective. 

Moving forward, consider what things looked like when you planned to grow your family, or when pregnancy or a child came into your life.

Ask yourself: how closely did my expectations match my experience?

For some, their experience perfectly reflects all that they expected. For many of us, it doesn’t. Factors like: fertility struggles, unplanned pregnancy, and pregnancy or child loss can be traumatic and disillusioning.

You may find yourself thinking, this isn’t what was supposed to happen. 

And this is where there is power in the reproductive story. We can identify what our hopes and dreams were for our reproductive experience and hold space for all of the ways that our experience differs from our expectations. This can provide us with a deeper understanding of the loss we may be experiencing, or the difficulty with accepting our experiences. More than anything, it gives a space for us to create the narrative of our experiences and hold space for whatever you went through and however you feel. 

If you feel that you are having a hard time accepting your experiences and how they differ from your dreams, or are working through trauma and loss, reaching out to a therapist who is certified in Perinatal Mental Health can be a huge source of support and growth for you. If you feel ready to begin your healing journey, feel free to reach out for a free 15 minute phone consultation.